1201
00:59:23,556 --> 00:59:25,308
And this poor bastard
in the middle
1202
00:59:25,433 --> 00:59:27,560
- probably hasn't been pushed in months.
- Tragic.
1203
00:59:27,643 --> 00:59:29,228
It's tr-you know what?
It is. Help.
1204
00:59:29,311 --> 00:59:31,647
You know, you say you've been looking
for an idea for a children's book.
1205
00:59:31,729 --> 00:59:33,773
How about all these
inanimate objects of yours?
1206
00:59:33,856 --> 00:59:36,526
The spoon that never gets used.
1207
00:59:36,608 --> 00:59:39,528
The missing sock that
reunites with his twin.
1208
00:59:39,610 --> 00:59:42,738
The multi-CD player that
tragically gets turned off
1209
00:59:42,821 --> 00:59:44,864
seconds before proudly finishing
1210
00:59:44,948 --> 00:59:47,033
a five-disc shuffle.
1211
00:59:49,493 --> 00:59:50,828
That's so it.
1212
00:59:50,910 --> 00:59:52,370
Yes, it is.
1213
00:59:53,621 --> 00:59:54,622
Roderick...
1214
00:59:57,082 --> 00:59:59,501
I've been looking
for you all my life.
1215
01:00:06,839 --> 01:00:08,507
You're the best!
1216
01:00:08,590 --> 01:00:11,302
Come on. Get out.
1217
01:00:11,467 --> 01:00:14,429
Okay. The cheek thing had thrown me a bit.
1218
01:00:14,511 --> 01:00:16,680
But there's nothing
like a warm kiss
1219
01:00:16,763 --> 01:00:18,765
coming after a delicious
home-cooked meal.
1220
01:00:18,848 --> 01:00:21,017
Compliments to the chef.
1221
01:00:21,100 --> 01:00:21,600
Hmm.
1222
01:00:25,228 --> 01:00:27,981
- Yup. I was back in the kitchen.
- Yeah?
1223
01:00:28,063 --> 01:00:30,816
And the chef thinks
you're pretty great, too.
1224
01:00:32,692 --> 01:00:34,694
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm just-just not-
1225
01:00:34,776 --> 01:00:36,445
- No, no, no, no. It's okay.
- I'm just feeling-
1226
01:00:36,528 --> 01:00:37,654
Just relax. It's okay-
1227
01:00:37,738 --> 01:00:40,073
- No, Roderick.
- It's all right.
1228
01:00:42,782 --> 01:00:44,701
I adore you.
1229
01:00:44,784 --> 01:00:46,828
I do.
1230
01:00:46,910 --> 01:00:48,621
I'm just...
1231
01:00:48,704 --> 01:00:50,039
screwed up about sex.
1232
01:00:50,121 --> 01:00:51,331
Ah, it's okay-
1233
01:00:51,414 --> 01:00:53,499
I mean, you're handsome.
1234
01:00:53,583 --> 01:00:55,335
Devilishly so,
if you must know.
1235
01:00:56,501 --> 01:01:00,964
It's just... you so remind me
1236
01:01:01,047 --> 01:01:02,715
of the guy my mom went out with,
1237
01:01:02,797 --> 01:01:04,507
after the divorce, Rockin' Randy.
1238
01:01:04,591 --> 01:01:05,550
He ran the surf shop.
1239
01:01:05,634 --> 01:01:09,470
And he was a cross
between you and Bam-Bam
1240
01:01:09,470 --> 01:01:11,680
from The Flintstones.
1241
01:01:11,763 --> 01:01:13,181
Listen, okay, look.
1242
01:01:13,264 --> 01:01:15,183
I'm not saying nothing's
ever gonna happen between us.
1243
01:01:15,265 --> 01:01:17,184
I'm not saying that. I'm just-
1244
01:01:19,352 --> 01:01:21,187
I'm just saying
if it's gonna happen...
1245
01:01:22,604 --> 01:01:23,855
it's just gonna happen.
1246
01:01:23,939 --> 01:01:25,899
- Yeah.
- Right?
1247
01:01:25,982 --> 01:01:27,359
Yeah.
1248
01:01:27,441 --> 01:01:28,901
Really, why worry about it?
1249
01:01:31,402 --> 01:01:32,445
You're the best.
1250
01:01:33,780 --> 01:01:35,365
I'm gonna clean up.
1251
01:01:36,615 --> 01:01:39,117
You can pick out another DVD.
1252
01:01:39,200 --> 01:01:40,660
Something funny.
1253
01:01:49,750 --> 01:01:51,085
I guess you could say
1254
01:01:51,167 --> 01:01:53,836
that's when the madness set in.
1255
01:01:53,920 --> 01:01:55,880
Thanks.
1256
01:01:55,963 --> 01:01:58,757
So Miranda and I went to
the Fellini retrospective yesterday.
1257
01:01:58,839 --> 01:02:01,717
Oh, she said the coolest thing.
1258
01:02:01,801 --> 01:02:04,303
- If Marcelo were alive-
- Have you fucked her yet?
1259
01:02:06,512 --> 01:02:08,013
What is with that question?
1260
01:02:08,097 --> 01:02:09,723
Have you fucked her yet?
1261
01:02:09,807 --> 01:02:11,100
Have you fucked her yet?
1262
01:02:11,182 --> 01:02:13,226
Son...
1263
01:02:13,309 --> 01:02:14,602
have you fucked her yet?
1264
01:02:14,685 --> 01:02:15,845
Yo, Rod, have you fucked her-
1265
01:02:15,894 --> 01:02:17,104
Hey, have you-
1266
01:02:24,484 --> 01:02:25,694
Let me tell you something.
1267
01:02:25,777 --> 01:02:29,072
Miranda and I are building
a bond of trust and respect.
1268
01:02:29,154 --> 01:02:31,657
Excuse me for still believing
that love is something
1269
01:02:31,739 --> 01:02:34,909
more than a sloppy
fusion of genitalia.
1270
01:02:34,992 --> 01:02:37,244
Miranda, we need
to discuss something.
1271
01:02:37,327 --> 01:02:40,247
- I-
- Oh, shit.
1272
01:02:40,329 --> 01:02:42,248
- Shit, shit, shit.
- You okay?
1273
01:02:42,330 --> 01:02:43,915
Hide me.
No, just hide me.
1274
01:02:43,999 --> 01:02:45,000
Sure.
1275
01:02:45,083 --> 01:02:47,919
There's
a Frida Kahlo-looking dude.
1276
01:02:48,002 --> 01:02:48,919
No, no, right-
1277
01:02:49,003 --> 01:02:50,129
Oh, no, I got it.
1278
01:02:50,211 --> 01:02:54,090
I met him at this Halloween
Poe poetry reading thing.
1279
01:02:54,172 --> 01:02:55,799
I can't believe
I slept with him.
1280
01:02:55,882 --> 01:02:56,883
I was wasted.
1281
01:02:56,967 --> 01:02:59,177
Halloween, two weeks
ago Halloween?
1282
01:02:59,260 --> 01:03:01,512
I told you,
I'm totally screwed up about sex.
1283
01:03:01,596 --> 01:03:04,056
Screwed up about sex?
Screwed up about sex?
1284
01:03:04,139 --> 01:03:05,765
It's more like you're screwing.
1285
01:03:05,849 --> 01:03:07,267
That's funny.
1286
01:03:07,349 --> 01:03:08,642
Come on, let's go
somewhere else.
1287
01:03:10,184 --> 01:03:11,394
Bam-Bam.
1288
01:03:16,315 --> 01:03:17,816
Back in the day,
1289
01:03:17,899 --> 01:03:21,445
if a woman didn't have
sex with you it was okay,
1290
01:03:21,569 --> 01:03:25,406
because it wasn't like she was having sex
with anyone else.
1291
01:03:25,488 --> 01:03:28,033
Where is that whore-bitch
Jane Austen when you need her?
1292
01:03:28,115 --> 01:03:30,951
I chose to remember
the good times.
1293
01:03:31,034 --> 01:03:32,201
The way Miranda made you feel
1294
01:03:32,285 --> 01:03:34,913
like you were the only
one in the world.
1295
01:03:34,995 --> 01:03:37,623
That time she read
my slaughterhouse reform bill.
1296
01:03:41,042 --> 01:03:44,295
It's wonderful, just wonderful.
1297
01:03:46,295 --> 01:03:48,714
But then there was
that next day at lunch.
1298
01:03:48,797 --> 01:03:50,049
How was that salad for you?
1299
01:03:50,131 --> 01:03:51,049
Oh...
1300
01:03:53,927 --> 01:03:56,721
Wonderful, just wonderful.
1301
01:04:03,934 --> 01:04:07,354
And in conclusion, yeah,
go ahead, crucify me,
1302
01:04:07,436 --> 01:04:09,230
but I refuse to live in a society
1303
01:04:09,313 --> 01:04:11,982
that has reduced the world
to the question,
1304
01:04:12,065 --> 01:04:13,566
"Have you fucked her yet?"
1305
01:04:13,650 --> 01:04:16,069
That would be a no.
1306
01:04:17,945 --> 01:04:19,465
I don't even think
he's seen her naked.
1307
01:04:26,075 --> 01:04:27,993
Oh...
1308
01:04:28,077 --> 01:04:31,455
Wonderful, just wonderful.
1309
01:04:31,537 --> 01:04:32,705
What the fuck?
1310
01:04:36,833 --> 01:04:41,213
I'm not saying nothing's
ever gonna happen between us.
1311
01:04:53,388 --> 01:04:55,014
Doctor...
1312
01:04:55,097 --> 01:04:56,807
Mir-hah!
1313
01:04:56,890 --> 01:04:58,392
That's what I'm talking about.
1314
01:04:58,474 --> 01:05:01,269
Yes, Dr. Mirabella Stone!
1315
01:05:01,352 --> 01:05:04,772
No! No!
1316
01:05:04,854 --> 01:05:05,354
No!
1317
01:05:17,239 --> 01:05:18,490
Don't mock me.
1318
01:05:18,573 --> 01:05:20,032
Miranda told me
she was coming out
1319
01:05:20,116 --> 01:05:21,284
of a bad relationship.
1320
01:05:21,367 --> 01:05:24,245
And no one has ever had sex
coming out of a bad relationship.